Coffee, tea or . . . Leinie’s?

by Nancy Linenkugel

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It was a pleasure to be invited to a party with other faculty and staff at a professor’s home. The first thought might be to not want one more thing to do on a free evening, but once you get there, you’re glad you went. This is how I felt, anyway.

I spoke with lots of faculty and spouses I’d never met before. The hosts made sure to show me the six-pack of Leinenkugel Beer they provided as a special gesture of inclusion. (Yes, my family is related from the way-back days but – surprise, surprise – I’ve never liked the taste of any beer, Leinie’s or not.)

My polite refusal always spawns a question or two along the lines of, “Sister, aren’t you permitted to drink beer?” “Why yes,” I respond. “I can have alcoholic beverages. I just never developed the taste for beer or wine, so that leaves more for you!”

The questioners give me looks of you-poor-thing-you’re-missing-half-your-life as they slip away, heading directly to the bar for their own refills.

I grew up in a home where alcohol was served judiciously. There was always cold beer and sodas in the fridgie. Holidays saw the whiskey bottle adorned in a crocheted black poodle cover make an appearance on the kitchen counter, ready to provide the main ingredient for a highball – the fanciest drink enjoyed by my folks. And coffee was brewed all day long. How I emerged without liking beer, wine, coffee or even soda is a family mystery. 

If you like those beverages – go for it. Enjoy them. I’ll stick with exciting choices like water or lemonade or tea.

I think it was in a “Far Side” cartoon that a group of lemmings was headed over the cliff, but one was wearing a red bow tie singing, “I’ve Gotta Be Me.” Now that’s my kind of lemming. That had to be the Franciscan in the pack. (Did you catch what beverage was in its hand?)

[Sr. Nancy Linenkugel is a Sylvania Franciscan sister and chair of the department of Health Services Administration at Xavier University, Cincinnati, Ohio.]